I’m sorry but those are micro-aggressions!
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Hi! Let me introduce myself quickly before we get started. I’m Danielle Nguyen, a 1st year Communications student, born and raised in Australia, and the eldest daughter to my First Generation Vietnamese immigrant parents.
And I’m hoping to provide you some information about the common micro-aggressions that I have witnessed, personally lived through, and believe that the Asian community in Australia have had to deal with for far too long now.
Before we dive into any big explanations, let me first explain what a micro-aggression is.
As according to the Momentous Institute, “Microagressions are small infractions that communicate a bias of some kind. They’re often unintentional or even subconscious and are not even clearly racially motivated. But they pass along small messages of racist concepts.”
Now, let me preface and say, if you’ve ever done any of these things I’m about to list, It’s Okay!
I don’t think it would be right to assume anyone that’s ever offended me, accidentally or not, is evil.
As long as you’re trying to learn from it!
I’m sure most of people I’ve encountered didn’t ever mean to be racist OR condescending in the slightest! But the unfortunate truth is: it’s still racism. Whether or not the individual meant it, it was still a hurtful misconception that I wish we didn’t have to deal with.
Now these misconceptions include: *drumroll please*
1. Lots of backhanded or just really strange compliments!
“You’re so pretty for an asian!” — a man genuinely trying to hit on my friend and being very confused when she didn’t think this was a compliment.
“Wow! Your english is so proper!” — a lady that I just finished serving at work who probably assumed that my first language wasn’t English and initially talked to me in broken English because of this assumption.
Please don’t call us exotic. We aren’t birds. We’re just asian.
2. Making fun of our food!
Unfortunately, I grew up with a lot of the food I know and love being ridiculed and laughed at just because the kid that was sitting near me didn’t know any better.
“Is that grass?”
No, it’s seaweed. And its very nice to have alongside rice!
“Are those worms?”
No, they’re just shrimp crackers. And they’re very nice to have as a light snack!
A lot of these snacks I would have loved to share with others but I can’t blame a child for not knowing any better. Though, I would like to hope that I could ask parents and adults now to teach kids to be a bit more polite if they didn’t know or like other people’s food.
Now, I believe it is one thing to be an ignorant child and ask a silly question.
However.
To say someone’s food is “going against any sort of humanity”?
Assuming the person writing this article is a grown educated adult, I can’t excuse that as ignorance. That is simply a lack of respect towards the culture.
Cultural differences are simply cultural differences. If you do not enjoy the food of another culture, Don’t Eat It. There is absolutely no reason to be rude regardless of who’s culture you’re talking about.
3. Asian eyes and facial features!
Ah. ah.
Now this one. This one really grinds my gears.
I had grown up with a lot of kids pulling their eyes back to mimic (mock) my ‘Asian eyes’ and even little 7 year old me was able to recognise “hey! I don’t like that!” But once again. They’re kids. They’ll make mistakes and grow from their mistakes.
BUT
Take that knowledge of my childhood. Recognise that that is the same childhood of many of my friends and my family.
And imagine how we felt when we saw the fox eyes trend.
My eyes and my trauma are not your aesthetic.
“Its just a pose.”
It’s a pose that has been used for decades to mock and humiliate Asian people for their facial features.
You might argue “its not used for mockery anymore its appreciation!”
This is not the look of appreciation.
Pandas? A mask and gloves? The lovely individual in the middle pulling her eyes back? Is this what appreciation is meant to look like?
If you genuinely don’t understand what makes the fox eye ‘trend’ so hurtful, please think about it this way.
We’ve been bullied and judged all our lives for looking the way we do. We’ve been told we would look prettier if our eyes were bigger and less slanted. But now, it’s a trend? All because Bella Hadid started it? Bella Hadid has not, will not, and will never go through what we have had to go through all our lives just because of our facial features and culture.
Asian eyes and asian features have existed before they were considered ‘trendy’. They are not a gimmick for people to borrow when it’s trendy and return when it’s not.
If you’re looking for more information on the fox eye trend:
Consider reading these articles written by Asian-American women about their experience with racism and their personal feelings on the fox-eye trend!
Sara Li (TeenVogue) focuses on the cultural appropriation of Asian features
Kira Wang (34th Street) focuses on the racist aspects of the fox-eye trend as well as other celebrities that have been accused of partaking in the trend
Jennifer Li (Byrdie) talks about being able to love her Asian eyes despite the racial bullying she received as a child
Back on to a happier note, let me say again. If you’ve ever done any of these things,
It’s Okay!
Always as long as you’re learning.
I can’t expect everyone to know everything about every culture but it would be nice and very appreciated if people could just be a little bit nicer.
If you don’t know what my food is, please don’t say its gross. Just ask me what it is. I’d love to explain and share it with you.
If you want to know my ethnicity, you can just ask me “what’s your ethnicity?” Please don’t ask me where I’m from. It’s Australia. This is my home too.
So please! Be nice. I would love to share my culture with you. We all would always love to share our culture with you.
